Couples therapy can seem daunting. It’s normal to have concerns. People worry that the therapist might side your spouse or judge you, the process won’t work, or leave you worse off than when you started. We want to debunk 5 common myths about couples therapy.
- It’s just an opportunity for your significant other to conspire with someone else and gang up on you.
The role of the couples therapist is to remain impartial. Rather than taking sides, your therapist will listen to both you and your partners’ perspectives, in order to get an understanding of the big picture. Once this is obtained, they can help you to see what needs to be addressed collectively moving forward. The relationship is the client and that is what they therapist is focused on enhancing.
- Couples therapy is only for couples that are in distress or are on the verge of splitting up.
It is also useful for those looking to better an already positive relationship. Couples therapy can help to improve communication, and facilitate both partners’ needs being met so that you can be as satisfied with your relationship as possible. You don’t have to be in crisis to seek out couples therapy. In fact, is best to have come in prior to this.
- Your therapist will analyze your situation, tell you what to do, and everything will be good again moving forward.
Couples therapy is a collaborative process that requires effort from all parties involved. The therapist will help you identify as a couple what works best the relationship. If you’re not willing to make changes to better your relationship, then nothing your therapist does or says is going to significantly help. At the end of the day, the changes have to come from you and your partner, as you are the experts in your own lives.
- Seeking out couples therapy negates the need for individual therapy.
Oftentimes couples therapy and individual therapy occur simultaneously. This happens because one or both partners may have their own concerns that need to be dealt with outside the context of the relationship, before changes can be made within it.
- Couples therapy takes a really, really long time.
More so than individual therapy, most forms of couples therapy takes a problem solving approach. Therapy isn’t about dwelling about the past or trying to figure out exactly why things happened the way they did, or who is “right” and who is “wrong”. Instead, it focuses on actively making changes going forward, in order to effectively improve your relationship.